25 Things

Mum posted hers on her blog, so I figure I can do the same to mine. I'll also add comments or explanations on each point, just so that you aren't bored by having to read this twice.

1. I once peed on a dead monkey just so that I could say "Yes" if anyone ever asked me if I've peed on a dead monkey.
-No, nobody has ever asked me if I've peed on a dead monkey. Well, except for the companion who convinced me to do it.

2. There's a small dent on my head that I got from falling while running around a coffee table and hitting my head on the corner.
-I am now paranoid about my sons around coffee tables.

3. I had my gallbladder removed in 2004 because of gall stones, and then I had surgery to remove a kidney stone in 2005. (Not as impressive as Mary's streak of abdominal surgery, I know, but I think it's cool.)
-I never felt pain from the gallstone. When I had the kidney stone attack, I went to the doctor, who said, "Yeah, sounds like a kidney stone." However, the ultrasound didn't find a kidney stone. It did find a gallstone, though, which was far away from where the pain happened. The next year, after the gallstone was gone and I was still having stone attacks and blood in my urine, they found the kidney stone using a CT scan.

4. I've seen the inside of my own bladder.
-this was when they were trying to find out why there was blood in my urine, which eventually lead to the CT scan that discovered the kidney stone.

5. I knew Avril's brother and sister before I knew her. Also, I went to high school with one of her sisters-in-law. In fact, my cousin Neil used to date that particular sister-in-law.
-Avril is seven years younger than me. Her second brother is my age, and he is the one who married the girl that I went to high school with. That's how I met him. Her older sister was friends with Noah, and we were in the same singles ward. It is through her that I met Avril.

6. I was less confident as an attractive 18-year-old B student than I was as a fat, bespectacled 25-year-old college drop-out.
-It's amazing what a mission and an engagement (albeit a failed engagement) will do to a guy's confidence.

7. I'm the fifth child of seven, and I'm the second of two sons. Also, my father is the second of two sons. COINCIDENCE?! Yes.
-If this were a fantasy novel, Alex would have formidable magical powers.

8. I was the fourth of my siblings to get married at age 26.
-the first three: Rob, Amy, and Sara.

9. I've been to as many countries as I have States. (Five. Countries: Canada, USA, Taiwan, China, Philippines. States: Maine, Montana, California, Utah, Colorado.)
-Mary says I've been to New York state. Is that true?

10. Of the places listed in #9, I was only in the airport for the following: Taiwan, China, Colorado.
-All very nice airports.

11. By the time Kenny is three years old, he will have lived in six different places.
-Where will the sixth place be? Tune in for more details. (I hope it's Picture Butte.)

12. Someone once robbed me at gunpoint at the motel I worked at a couple of years ago.
-turned out to be a fake gun. And good news: she's probably out of prison now!

13. Someone once threatened to kill me with a ballpoint pen at the other motel I worked at a couple of years ago.
-"Did I just hear you on the radio?" was the first thing he said to me. Three months in prison.

14. I don't like working at motels.
-And not just because of the constant threats on my life.

15. I once tried to teach myself Korean because my boss kept speaking Korean. I got bored after a week.
-Anyong ha seyo.

16. I own three video game consoles. (PS2, XBox 360, Wii)
-Technically, the Wii belongs to Avril.

17. I bought a deep fat fryer and an exercise bike within weeks of each other.
-One makes me fat, the other makes me not-so-fat.

18. I've eaten more beef jerky in the last few months than I have in my whole life up until a few months ago.
-It might be true. I haven't kept detailed records of my beef jerky consumption.

19. I am sometimes prone to exaggeration.
-Like when I talk about how much beef jerky I've been eating lately.

20. I own 22 different Superman DVDs. (NOTE: Even though it follows the exaggeration comment, this one is not an exaggeration.)
-And there are lots more still to be had.

21. A mutual friend wanted Heidi Bialik (who later married my cousin/best friend) and me to date each other despite the fact that, at the time, she was 17 and I was 25.
-I had a rule in my last couple years of singlehood: no dating anyone younger than Emily.

22. I go through a beard-goatee-beardless cycle about three times a year. Right now I'm in the goatee phase.
-Avril likes my goatee face the best. If I was significantly thinner, I'd be clean-shaven all the time. Facial hair masks my double chin.

23. I didn't own a cellphone until last year.
-Useful tools, but I hate cellphone culture.

24. I had nine ingrown toenail surgeries on my mission. All on the same toe. The last one, which was also the most drastic one, was on my 22nd birthday.
-The first three surgeries were done by the mission president's wife at the back of the chapel after zone conference.

25. Once a saw a blimp.
-I don't think anyone caught this Simpsons quote. Larry Burns (voiced by Rodney Dangerfield) said it.